Dear Jail Bitch,

Stop complaining about being shackled while giving birth in the slammer!  You are in jail heifer...not Baylor Medical Center.  Be glad they didn't make you deliver your baby while still wearing the tacky orange jumpsuit.

Sincerely,
DRJ

They call it JAIL for a reason lady! Read about it here...

Dear Amazon.com,

You have me strung out like a desperate crack whore!  Why must you be so addicting???

Sincerely,
DRJ

Dear President Obama,

I really do love ya, but you have to give it a rest with these daily campaign emails!!!

Sincerely,
DRJ

Dear Mahmoud Ahmadinejad,

You should remember... We don't need a drone to destroy your entire military presence.  It won't matter that you have a U.S. drone if you aren't alive to use it.

Sincerely,
DRJ

Gloating is great until you're being scrapped up off the pavement. Read about it here...

Dear Dallas Mavericks,

I don't know what the hell is going on over there in downtown Dallas, but you ALL need to sort your lives out.  What kind of players walk away from a championship team?  What kind of executives let them?  All the fans have seen during this lockout is greed.  You can all do better than what you are showing us right now.

Sincerely,
DRJ

Shameful mess...read all about it here...

Dear Mugger Who Got His ASS Beaten,

This is what you get for spending more time getting lines cut into your hair than you do educating yourself.  Go back to school and learn how to earn a living instead of trying to steal one.  Your first assignment is to look up the definition of "ironic".  Below, is an example to help you define the word.

Sincerely,
DRJ

Ironic: A man with the last name Miranda having his Miranda rights read to him.

Dear Donald Trump,

You have the nerve to call people "joke candidates"?  
That's the punch-line calling the joke funny.

Sincerely,
DRJ

   A jackass calling other people donkeys...read all about it here!

Dear Colorado,

Quentin Tarantino called.  He'd like you to give him the plot to his next movie back!  What's with all the meth and sex?

Sincerely,

DRJ

P.S. - You should have Ted Haggard and former Sheriff Patrick Sullivan trade notes.  

Meth and Sex Saga ~ Eclipse - Starring Pastor Ted Haggard

Meth and Sex Saga ~ Breaking Dawn - Starring Sheriff Patrick Sullivan