Dear Men Who Have Surgery to be Taller,

You should trying having your plastic surgeon attach some bigger balls instead of having your legs surgically broken and then lengthened in an effort to get a dose of self esteem.  Be serious.

Sincerely,
DRJ

Doing WAY too much...

Dear Rihanna and Chris Brown,

Ya'll are both fucked up in the head.  You make great music together though.  Keep your hands to yourselves at all times and let your respective body guards beat the shit out of each other!

Sincerely,
DRJ

ummm what will Miranda Lambert say now??? LOL

Dear Karmin,

Thank you for giving me the perfect song to dance to while naked and folding laundry!  Much love!

Sincerely,
DRJ

Listen to the single Brokenhearted here!!!

Dear Christian Drivers,

For those of you with the church bumper-stickers, the stupid little fish, and the general obnoxious christian announcements all over your car, save it!  Everyone knows you hate Jesus and that you're an asshole.  We can tell by the way you drive.  

Sincerely,

DRJ

He probably wouldn't drive like a Satan worshiper. 

Dear Karl Lagerfeld,

You have the nerve to criticize Adele and others?  That's hilarious considering you ALWAYS looks like a character in a Tim Burton movie.  The gloves are played out and so is your mind.

You heard it here first.

Sincerely,
DRJ

Why would anyone ask Karl Lagerfeld his opinion on anything? Read about it here...

Dear e-Toilet Multitaskers,

I've sent texts, posted on Facebook, and wrote this blog all from the comfort of my toilet!  Long live the e-toilet warriors!  HAHA!

Sincerely,
DRJ

Interesting article on toilet multitasking!

Dear Bread Winners Driver,

Tailgating other drivers in morning traffic while going 75mph is not a great way to keep your company from having to pay out the ass for you causing an accident.  Moreover, swerving across four lanes of traffic to get one car ahead is not advisable.  I'm not sure if you were delivering breakfast for the restaurant or kidneys to a transplant recipient; but you need to seriously rethink your driving approach.  At the very least, you might try remembering that you are a direct reflection of the company for which you deliver.

Sincerely, 

DRJ

Tuesday Morning: January 31

Bread Winners Management: Please click on the photo shown here to enlarge.

UPDATE:  I was contacted almost immediately after my posting here.  The Vice President of Operations was  kind and apologetic.  She also let me know that they've conveyed the importance of safe driving!  I appreciate the quick and sincere response.  Thank you!
Cake Balls for everyone!  

Dear People Who Are Not Paying Attention,

Just because Facebook says I live in London, does not mean I actually live there.  Please pay attention.

Sincerely,
DRJ

If you wanna be somebody...if you wanna go somewhere...you better wake up and paaaaaaaaaaay attention!