Dear Madonna,

I Googled the word "unnecessary".  This is the image that popped up...

Madonna dusts off her 500 year old nipple and pulls it out for the crowd.


Sincerely,
DRJ

P.S. - The blow-up doll look is out.  You heard it here first.  

Dear Canadian Conservation Officials,

You euthanized a bear for eating a serial killer's remains?  You should be supplying this "service animal" with an endless supply of sauteed kitty-cats and puppy-dogs and build him a state-of-the-art den with 430 cable channels and WiFi!!!

Sincerely,
DRJ

Noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!